The month has been all about love and the different types that we find. I didn’t get too personal here but I hope that my recommendations are helpful to you! I’ll talk more about March and what all to expect tomorrow. But I just wanted to share some of my ideas here now. March has a whole week of spring break which I’ll talk about a lot in my posts. The main theme is just going to be education. Some important things to learn, guides, lists, all that sort of stuff. There will also be a lot of recommendations that I find helpful and hopefully you will enjoy.
Monthly Archives: February 2015
Most Romantic Love Letters
Love letters are such a rare romance these days. Back in the day, it was a beautiful way to express your feelings for another person that you can’t currently be with. Now, we express how we feel using text messages which isn’t nearly as personal. I’m going to do things a little differently here, I’m going to link to these famous love letter posts on different websites. I didn’t see the point in making my own list since I would include the same exact ones that Time did and I also Brain Pickings collection of letters as well! Without further ado, I hope that you enjoy these heartwarming and endearing love letters. Maybe it’ll even inspire you to give up the cell phones and pick up the pencil and writing some romantic letters of your own! A girl can dream right?
Time’s Famous Love Letters Article
Brain Picking’s Frida Kahlo Letter to Diego Rivera
Love Letters From Famous People
Glamour’s List of Most Romantic Love Letters
Huffington Post Handwritten Letters
Best Love Quotes
What can be better than love quotes? Not all that many things. These are my favorite quotes about the messiness and madness that comes with being in love.
1. “You don’t love somebody because they’re perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.” – Jodi Picoult
2. “We accept the love we think we deserve.” – Stephen Chbosky
3. “As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.” – John Green
4. “I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.” – Pablo Neruda
5. “Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.” – Neil Gaiman
6. “I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts and I’ve led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough” – Nicholas Sparks
7. “We’re all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness—and call it love—true love.” – Robert Fulghum
8. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” – C.S. Lewis
9. “Love is needing someone. Love is putting up with someone’s bad qualities because they somehow complete you.” – Sarah Dessen
10. “I fell in love with her courage, her sincerity, and her flaming self respect. And it’s these things I’d believe in, even if the whole world indulged in wild suspicions that she wasn’t all she should be. I love her and it is the beginning of everything.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald
Best Modern Love Columns
The New York Time’s Modern Love Column is one of my absolute favorites. It tells a variety of different stories depending on the column that particular day. Some of them are sad stories about married and single life. Some are happy stories that feel you with some type of joy. These are my personal favorite ones that are a mixture of the two.
This is an interesting piece about being a 30-year-old unmarried woman who really wants to be married. She confesses that she’s not denying marriage for any particular reason. Instead, she craves this and dreams of it really happening. “What’s wrong with me? Plenty. But that was never the point.” This ending statement is really beautiful and charming. I love this so much.
2. The Race Grows Sweeter Near Its Final Lap
An endearing tale about finding love later on in life. It’s neither of their first marriages but they find comfort and love with one another which is all that you can hope for.
This story is so beautifully written that you can’t help but fall in love with it. You can feel how honest and raw the story is. It’s about a divorced woman who has kids and her adventures in dating one particular lifelong bachelor. It has a few twists which make it unique and keep you holding on until the last word.
4. Age Is No Obstacle to Love, or Adventure
Another tale about being older and finding love. I like this one as well because of how personal it is. It’s a new personal experience told from their own point of view. I really enjoy this one.
This is a more unique one since it’s not one personal love story as usual. Instead, it’s from the point of view of Modern Love’s editor Daniel Jones. He talks about how the two questions asked by all the readers that submit a story into Modern Love is either “How do I find love?” or “How do I get it back?” He explores these two and also reveals more about the particular stories told and the answers received by them.
6. A Life Plan For Two, Followed By One
This story is such a charming look at the crushes that we have. I love her writing style and just the general way she tells this story. This was the first Modern Love article I ever read and it’s safe to say it got me hooked!
Other Forms of Love
So today, I’m going to quickly breakdown the types of love that are out there.
Self-love, romantic, friendship, parent-child, and much more.
Sometimes, we might confuse love with some other emotion. When it comes down to it, we know deep down what’s love and what it isn’t. It’s some kind of human instinct that people have. Basically, we all know what this is so you don’t need me to tell you.
Self-love is the one that I talked about just the other day. It’s an important thing but also a rare thing. We don’t love ourselves as much as we should. I’m not going to get into the whole thing because it’ll start to just sound straight up preachy. So I’m just going to say that this is something we need and hopefully continue to get better about as we go through life.
Friendship is a really strong form of love. It’s something that you count on. We always love and depend upon our friends whenever we need them the most. It’s just nice to know that someone has our backs and that’s why friendship is so incredible.
The parent-child love is another form of love that is a bond that isn’t easily broken. I know that there are exceptions that I don’t want to get into, but I’ve always heard that there’s just something about having your own child. You become so attached to the little baby that you helped make. And most people have that natural instinct to protect them, love, and care for them. I’m thankful to have those kind of parents that provide unconditional love and support for me.
There’s other type of loves: the romantic one is really obvious. It’s the one that’s probably subject to change the most. Obviously, that differs from person to person but that’s what I’ve found from personal experience. Romantic love is a whirlwind and it can be nice to feel wanted by that person for however long it happens to last.
Whatever love it just so happens to be, my advice is to just hang on to it and be grateful for it. Don’t take any second for granted.
Spotlight On: Jordan Catalano
Jordan Catalano from My So-Called Life was a total dreamboat. Yes, he had the looks part down but there wasn’t all that much depth too him. Jordan wasn’t exactly the sharpest crayon in the crayon box. I always felt sorry for Brian but I always wanted Angela to end up with Jordan simply because Brian got on my nerves. You got to admit, annoying or not, Brian certainly treated her with a hell a lot more respect than Jordan ever did.
The majority of Jordan’s appeal comes from his looks so I’m not even going to try to deny it. He has learning problems which set him back and frustrate him. He doesn’t want people to think he’s stupid but he doesn’t try to stop them. Instead, he basically just struggles in silence. He’s lucky to have Brian help him out with his schoolwork and with getting Angela back even though he’s not appreciative of that at all.
The reason why it really doesn’t matter that Jordan is so well liked because of his looks is because that’s what a lot of teen girls like. Our first crush may not be on the most intellectual guy. I can’t speak on behalf of all girls but this is what I’ve personally found in my own life and in those closest to me. We’re drawn to the popular angsty teen guy because that’s part of who we want to be. We may be a really good girl who’s never done anything dangerous in her whole life but we don’t let that side show. We dream of rebelling with the hot James Dean type. He rebels against his surroundings and that draws the girl in.
Angela maintains her fascination with Jordan throughout the entire first and only season. This is more than just a crush for Angela – Jordan is everything to her. Is this the right decision? Well, it is to Angela and that’s all that really matters at the end of the day since she’s the one forced to live with her choices. Jordan screws up big time – he sleeps with Angela’s best friend. He does this mostly due to the fact that Angela won’t put out and her friend does after the both had been drinking a lot. Setting the plots and storylines and aside and looking at strictly the facts, Jordan is screwed up. And Angela is okay with that and so therefore we’re okay with that too.
Birdman Review
Birdman is a weird yet brilliant film starring Michael Keaton, who is most famous for playing Batman. In this role, he plays Riggan Thomson, a washed-up actor who played the superhero Birdman in the popular franchise decades earlier. He attempts to make a comeback by acting on Broadway.
A lot of this film deals with Riggan being haunted by the role he previously played. Literally, he hears the voice of Birdman and it even follows him around. He also has magic powers and can fly which is definitely the weird thing about the movie.
However, it’s directing is really great and there isn’t a bad acting performance in the movie. Emma Stone shines as Riggan’s daughter who just got out of rehab and is now acting as his personal assistant. She resents her dad for missing out on most of her life and holds it over his head every chance she gets. This is one of the best performances I’ve seen from the Hollywood star.
As far as Oscars go, Boyhood started winning Best Picture awards early on in the award season. But Birdman hasn’t been counted out just yet. It’s pretty clear that the race is between Boyhood and Birdman to take the top award. Personally, I think Boyhood should win the award for reasons SMJ already talked about. The movie is easy to relate to and Birdman is only something that a specific group of people- those in show business can relate to.
Edward Norton has a memorable performance as an experienced Broadway actor Mike Shiner, who fills in for an actor that gets injured just days before the show opens for previews. Mike causes Riggan more harm than good. The two constantly clash and don’t agree on really anything. The tension between them creates an interesting but small part of this complicated plot.
There’s some dark moments of the film. Such as, the times when Riggan constantly battles with the fact that he wasn’t there for his wife and daughter. The movie is actually depressing at times. I heard that it was a comedy but I didn’t expect it to be so dark. The funny moments are brief but also memorable.
In my opinion, the best scene comes towards the end of the film. You’ll have to watch it, but I’ll give just a little hint. Basically, let’s just say that Michael Keaton’s character ends up running around Times Square in nothing but his pair of briefs. The moments in the show that go horribly wrong are when the movie finds it’s funny moments.
All in all, the movie is unique and I’ve never seen a movie quite like it. It’s also one of those movies where so much happens that you have to watch it back a second time just to catch everything. Whether or not it wins Best Picture, Best Actor, or any of the other Oscars it’s nominated for, this is still a movie worth watching. Did any of you see Birdman? Do you think that Michael Keaton played too much like Batman in this role? Let me know your thoughts!
Loving Yourself and Stuff
One of the most important forms of love that I haven’t mentioned yet is loving yourself. This is where everything really starts. It’s also by far the most difficult form of love. Both guys and girls struggle with self esteem from a fairly young age. Some may believe that guys don’t have the same kind of self esteem issues as girls which can be true to an extent considering the fact that such pressure is placed on girls from the time they reach kindergarten for the majority of their life. Guys don’t have the same exact degree of what they should look like. I do think that guys struggle with it because they don’t like who they are if they’ve ever been rejected or simply because of their own stereotypes.
Regardless of what sex you are, we can all agree that loving yourself is hard for us all. The trick I use to think about loving myself is thinking about yourself as a little girl or boy. This is a trick that Rae’s therapist in the British teen drama My Mad Fat Diary used. Basically, she had major weight problems for most of her life and she ended up binging and cutting which led to her staying in a mental hospital for a summer. She continues to meet with this therapist and her struggles are continuous but he tries to urge her to think of her childhood self. He tells her to close her eyes and picture that little girl and tell her that she’s fat. She does that, and then she ends up telling her that she’s beautiful and perfect and she shouldn’t let what others might think about her get to her. I think this is an effective way of thinking because who wants to be mean to a little kid? You think of your younger self, all hopeful and positive and you don’t want that person to change.
There’s a number of different ways we can change our ways of thinking. Self-image is a really major thing. It sets the focus for everything and causes you to think either good or bad things about yourself. It also helps to see yourself through the eyes of somebody else. Maybe somebody like a parent or grandparent that’s always told you how beautiful and what a good person you are. If they see the good that you can’t, just pretend that you’re them seeing you the way that they do. This is really tricky and I get that, but I think it might sort of work depending on who you are.
Personal Favorite Books
The only problem with this particular recommendation is that I’ve already talked about a lot of my favorite books. Since I read so much, I’m going to do my best to bring up books I haven’t already mentioned. These books are ones that really caused me to love reading. This love started from an early age so I’ll try to touch on some kids books as well.
Babysitter’s Club
These books were my absolute favorite growing up. I read pretty much every single one of these books. There was at least 100 in the series. I really think that reading these books from such a young age helped me love reading as much as I do now.
Junie B. Jones
Okay, I gotta give credit to Junie. I actually started reading these books long before babysitter’s club. I remember reading these in the first grade and absolutely loving them. I also credit Junie for making me such a sassy child. The character certainly had that part down. There are few characters as hilarious because this is an accurate portrayal of a young girl which is rare with books.
Charlotte’s Web
The first book that wasn’t a series that I fell in love with. The story of Charlotte’s Web is a classic for a reason. It’s one of the most honest and innocent displays of friendship that’s ever been written. I love the simplicity yet deep life lessons this one holds. It’s really one of the most beautiful books I’ve ever read.
American Girl
These are just four out of many many American Girl characters. These books were amazing and they also taught me a lot about history which is always a plus. The dolls were great but I personally enjoyed reading these since you become so invested with the stories and characters within these stories. I’m not sure which one is my favorite. The only doll I ever had was Kit but I always loved Samantha and Molly’s books were the ones I found myself reading the most.
Goosebumps
I still have nightmares about these books sometimes. They are so haunting and just straight up creepy. The one that always got me was Phantom of the Auditorium. I’ve read it about three or four times and I think the plot twist just shocks me no matter how many times I read it. I even watched the episode of Phantom of the Auditorium hoping that would cure my fears. Nope, I’m still creeped out like 10 years later.
Harry Potter
I didn’t get into these books until like 8th grade. By that point, a majority of the movies were already out but I was still a big fan of the story. I loved Hermione Granger and how intelligent she was and I was so envious of her being a witch and everything. I just really loved the first four books. I couldn’t get through the fifth one but the first four were amazing to me! They really got me back into reading.
A Mango Shaped Space
This book is probably the least known of the bunch so far. It really intrigued me the first time I read it. The main reason I included it on this list is because it’s the first book I remember crying over. The story was just so incredible and I’d never read anything like it. The book is about a girl who has synesthesia, which is a neurological phenomenon where you see letters and numbers as colors. It’s a really unique and rare thing that you never read about in fiction young adult books. It was a book that really blew me away and I still love it today.
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
Another series that I read in the fifth grade and really loved. It just taught me a lot about what it means to be a real friend. What these four characters have is something that every person longs for. They go through boys, deaths, sickness, pregnancy, and everything in between but they always stick together. And when they can’t physically be together, they just send the pants and it feels like they are really together. This is a book that I will always love, even though the last book was actually insane and weird.
Pros and Cons to Being In a Relationship
Sometimes it can be hard to determine whether or not you’re ready to be in a relationship. It depends a lot on particular circumstances. It’s hard to tell someone what to do or not do when all the circumstances aren’t known. This is just my list of the pros and cons to being in a relationship.
Pros:
Having someone to comfort and support you.
This is a major plus that I always miss when I’m not in a relationship. Knowing that someone is willing to run errands for you and drive to come see you and show you any kind of support possible is an incredible feeling. It sucks whenever that’s no longer there.
Someone to talk to.
This may be different for some people, but I love just having a boyfriend to talk to. He’s pretty much obligated to text you back and let you know he’s going to bed or tell you if he can’t come to his phone for a few hours. When you’re no long together, all that changes and it can be hard. If you’ve never dated and are thinking whether or not you want to be involved with this person, just think about the honeymoon phase. That’s a glorious period when he pays attention to you and shows interest but that ends at some point. Use your own judgment about whether or not you think this honeymoon period will end or not.
Getting to do sweet things for each other just to show how much you care.
There are some gifts and stuff you might buy a significant other that’s kind of weird to buy someone you’re not dating. When you’re in the awkward talking stage where you’re not sure where you’re going, it’s important to keep in mind just how much you’d do for this person. If the answer is not a whole lot, you might want to think more about the state of the relationship and where it’s heading.
Something to talk about with your friends.
Talking about boys with your friends is always the best. It can always make you feel like the odd one out when you don’t have a boyfriend. However, don’t feel pressured to jump into a relationship you’re not ready for. This is just a plus to brag about how sweet and awesome your boyfriend is if you’re ready to take things to that place.
It’s something extremely mutual.
This should be an obvious one. But sometimes guys may jump into something or even you might jump into it due to a number of different reasons. You know deep down whether or not you’re doing something for the right reasons. You can tell his deal based on his past relationships and don’t get too caught up on talking about the future. For instance, if he’s just gotten out of a relationship that’s fairly long term (3 months or longer) then don’t go there. He’s just looking for some kind of rebound and no one wants to be that girl.
Cons:
Feeling like you have someone to impress.
Looking cute all the time or feeling like you have to live up to the image of his ex or just the girls around in general. It can really suck and put a damper on the relationship but also on your own self-esteem. Avoid that at all costs.
When life gets in the way.
It can be stressful when you can’t control your plans. Like if one of you is super busy and you hardly get to see each other. This applies more to long term but sometimes even those who live close can find themselves barely getting any quality time.
The drama and fights.
It may just be me but it seems like a lot more fighting and drama happens once the relationship is official. You have more to argue about since your boyfriend and girlfriend and become more controlling and needy in a sense. Again, this might just be a Rachel thing but I’ve found this to happen in previous relationships. If I felt like I wasn’t good enough for him or something, I’d always fight and I don’t think that’d happen so frequently if we would’ve stayed in the talking stages for a while longer.
Jealousy!
This is by far the biggest con and yeah, it can happen when you’re talking but I feel like the green monster comes out more when it’s made official. When you aren’t together, you feel as if it’s not your place to say anything if you feel like he’s interested in someone else. He isn’t yours so why should you care in the first place? Is something we always ask ourselves at that point. While that still sucks, being together makes it even more serious. You get jealous over any girl he even glances. Again, I’m basing this on me and I get jealous over everything that a guy speaks to BASICALLY. I get jealous of ex girlfriends and all that. But, the jealousy can be overwhelming at times which just causes unnecessary stress and tension.
Rachel's Rambles 